Let me tell you about the glamorous life of an Indie Author. Of all the money we make. The fame, the countless lovers we could have, the long leisurely days spent relaxing on sunny beaches.
Dream on, my dear reader, dream on.
What the life of an Indie Author really looks like
Being a writer – and even more being an Indie author – is not a get rich quick scheme. That’s unfortunately not how it works. Those of us who are lucky enough to be able to make a living from their writing, have to work hard. Those of us who can’t make a living from their writing need another source of income. Usually, that means they have to work a muggle job so they can at least pay the rent.
I’m fortunate. I don’t have to work a muggle job because… I make enormous amounts of money from my writing. Let me show you the proof.
Yay for being disabled enough to receive a full disability allowance. At least I won’t starve while I’m trying to sell my books. 😀
An average day
- Four AM: I need to pee, but I don’t want to
- Five AM: If I don’t go to the loo now, I’ll have to change my sheets.
- Eight AM: NOT the alarm! I’d only just fallen back to sleep!
- Half eight: Trying to make breakfast while also brushing teeth, unloading the dishwasher, reading an ARC for another Indie author, and checking my email. “I’m not cut out for this!“
- Nine: My personal assistant (AKA Google Home) tells me it’s time to start my workday. But I hadn’t even finished reading that chapter yet!
My workday hasn’t even started, and I’m already tired. I log in to my Trello account to see what I need to do today. Oh, great! Create a shitload of social media content and schedule it. Also, write a poem. Write a blog post. Edit that short story, and get that last bit of formatting done. Engage with people on Social Media, and try to convince them that you’re a nice guy who really knows what he’s doing. But also make sure they know you’re a serial killer of fictional characters. Show them the evil SOB that you are as an author.
Market your books. They won’t sell themselves, you should know that by now!
Thank goodness I’ve got my lovely Personal Assistant to tell me when I need to eat, drink, and feed the cats, or we’d all go hungry at the Katz Residence.